eljuanaco

Post-Steroid?

2010-06-14T12:04:00.004-06:00

Interesting stat showing how baseball is evolving:

"At the height of the steroid era, in 2001, a total of two pitchers posted ERAs under 3.00. Right now, 25 starters have ERAs under 3.00." ... Buster Olney

I like this trend but I can't help but wonder how these pitchers are cheating to get these inflated ERA numbers.

The National- High Violet

2010-06-03T13:40:00.002-06:00

enjoy.

Clinical Psychology Program

2010-04-19T14:00:00.003-06:00

School is almost over and I cannot wait.

I will cross the finish line and I celebrate that.

It has been an adventure!

Levi is a cool dude... I'm really excited to get to know him.

1-30-2010

2010-01-30T09:11:00.002-07:00

Its snowing and sunny. the snowflakes are really big. Its puzzling.
J and I are happy here in our home on Blanchard. School is headed forcefully on. This semester is a big one... I am not sure how its all going to come together. and yet, somehow, I know it will. J is going to her final baby shower. They have been good to us. We have many new things, some for now, some for 2 months from now, some for 4 months from now, some for 6 months from now... etc. lots of new things.
Winter has kept us inside. Its so cold. but I've decided to like it this year... so far so good. i like it ok.

Things to do this today-
1. send proposal to professor- 15 page paper, Christian Theology- due March 5th
2. clean up around the house
3. Take olive for a walk.
4. grociery shopping. (just milk and fruit/ vegetables)-- keeping it fresh
5. begin Mad Men season 1 with J.
6. organize gifts from baby shower.
7. Drink beer, maybe tequila.

thats it.

Feb

2009-02-17T22:21:00.003-07:00

Feb. is a big month for our small family... my wife continues to blow my mind with her crusade to add beauty to this weary and god forsaken land. She will be showing in NY in a couple of weeks. visit www.jessicamdennis.com (should up after 2/25) to see her work

We saw Antony and the Johnsons for Valantines... they was good.

Psychology continues to be interesting... they say this is the semester that kicks your ass. I'm still waiting.

Church has been interesting. Jessica and I have enjoyed settling into it.

2008-12-12T12:05:00.004-07:00

I am watching The Wire... and enjoying it. It reminds me of a novel, like a book but instead I watch it.

Corruption is an amazing thing. It makes me chuckle; seeing my Governor get arrested for corrupt behavior: The feds tapped his phones... and he said lots of crazy shit... then got arrested. coulda been an episode out of The Wire.

Is it funny? I don't know... I thought so.

2008-12-12T12:01:00.003-07:00

Finals loom over head...

They say: 'boo!'

I say: 'oh shit, you fucken scared me'

2008-12-02T18:21:00.002-07:00

I postpone writing on death, identity, finding meaning and God...

the evolution of life is fascinating... how and what did we do to find ourselves in this place... for me: at my dining room table, in my home, with books and apple pie by my side. my dog, eating a bone. my cat, drinking my dog's water. I wonder about decisions and how they are made. decisions made by feelings that can't be trusted... makes for a tricky existence of who done its and crisis meetings... yes, always crisis.

The pendulum will continue to swing... back and forth, back and forth, back again... yes, always back again.

The Search

2008-12-02T18:15:00.000-07:00

is on.

phonesuckcuzidontanswereversoItoosuckalittle

2008-02-27T15:06:00.003-07:00

the red chair sitteth in the corner of my room. all alone, not sad but alone. it never gets sat on.

I'm happy about the Oscar results, though i truly loved There Will Be Blood... I thought Old Country for Old Men was fantastically put together and deserved the award. Though i was sad for Paul Anderson whom I also love. He'll be fine, I'm sure.

just so all of you know. I am procrastinating.

hi

2008-02-21T00:42:00.002-07:00

Sweet mercies, its cold. -1 to be precise, and its February... damn it. woosh.

well, finishing up my school apps. in position and ready to pounce.

i'm off speed. which is good.

theres a lady friend. we are rockin and rolling to the toons of life. she paints. and does book covers.

im bartending and serving. it can be fun.

Chicagos fun.

i smoked hookah a few days ago and i fear i may have lost a lunge.

tonight was the last of 4 nights of wilco shows in chicago where they played every song they ever wrote. i missed all the shows and am sad. i like wilco.

Sam Adams

2007-07-01T23:11:00.002-06:00

boston beer company makes sam adams summer ale.
which happends to be a wheat ale brewed with lemon and grains of paradise.
which makes enjoying a sam adams summer ale in a field of grains of paradise quite appropriate.
today i studied and studied and, well, i'm not remembering much. i believe there are two possible reasons for this dilemma. 1st, end of day brain fatigue. seems possible. 2nd, my genes which don't allow me to retain more data than absolutely necessary to survive. which seems to have some historical accuracy. all this is cute and fun and, quite honestly, neither options bothers me. i'll work somewhere really great that requires minimal data storage.
the obvious question being... why the hell am i getting into the world of education that seems to demand enormous amounts of data recall when i can't retain shit? What could have possibly compelled me to head in this direction?
i do believe the answer is the glory of success. all the high-fives... the celebrity that so naturally comes with being educated. the enormous amounts of money which inevitably will come which, of course, translates into pure joy and a happiness that passes all understanding. and i will be the evolutionary product of power. flexing my unmeasurable muscles for the world to see. Culminating with my people singing songs of worship to me and in all my greatness i will smile down upon them and say, 'no, do not praise me. praise Jesus, for he is worthy to be praised.'... and the sun would shine down, we would lie in fields of grain paradise drinking sam adams summer ale and have a huge affirmation session.

For The Record

2007-06-20T13:05:00.000-06:00

I'm an Immigrant.

Tuesday Night

2007-06-12T19:01:00.001-06:00

I think I will enjoy several cold adult beverages this evening...

and i will grill salmon, place it over spinach, add mandarin orange slices, perhaps toss some freshly baked almond slices in and finally, shower it with some pre-made, exotic, Asian dressing...

and then i will read about a childs developing brain.... etc. etc.
and then i will do statistics homework.

all the while i watch game 3 of the NBA finals... occasionally viewing the status of my FBB team, which looks to be off to a rough start today.

and then i will go to bed and read about the life of a hermaphrodite in Eugenides' Middlesex, and conclude the evening by slowly drifting into sweet, blissful sleep.

or maybe... just maybe... i'll skip it all and go to sleep now....

The Easy Life

2007-06-05T22:11:00.000-06:00

The ultimate test of successful living is underway. Summer has begun and i will try doing school. For those who are not accustom to life in the mid-west. Winters are terrible and last for 5 months. nothing happens in those 5 months. people cocoon. The ground thaws and people squeeze 12 months of fun and joy into 7 warm months and 2 hotter than hell months. Summer begins and with that I will try and tackle 2 classes at the local community college... also known as college of dupage... also known as the largest community college in the world... its true. But not to worry, I will precariously balance joyful living and productive school attending.

The joy of summer... the television has taken a break... and the wheat beers are flowing. My fun reading has increased.
I completed The Road by Cormac McCarthy, Slaughterhouse Five by Kurt Vonnegut, and A Farewell To Arms by Hemingway, and currently reading Middlesex by Jeffrey Eugenides... I believe there has been an increase to my reading because I have decided I don't HAVE to watch conan o'brien show or Jimmey Kimmel Live and I'm not married and so I can have beers and read, followed by my nightly shower, followed by reading in bed. and the result is reading.
I am not on an anti-war kick... though I am not a fan of war... the first three books I read this summer are all more or less anti-war books. All three were absolutely gorgeous books and after each I took a day and marinated in the mind blowing literature I had the fortune of running into.
aside from that I plan on hitting up the local pool. seeing fun music shows in Chicago. and joining the local tennis club.... and hosting fantastic friends on their way through to Europe...

I encourage any of you experiencing the joy of reading my blog to please purchase tickets to Chicago and come visit me. we will have fun. i promise.

Oh Chester!

2007-05-03T10:55:00.000-06:00

I have recently acquired two Persian cats (Chester 5 yrs, Galina 7 yrs). I thought it might be a good idea as I live alone and in need of some company. I have not determined whether it was a brilliant move or just really stupid. I have never had cats or pets really, so this is my first go around with them. So far they've been good and not so good.

positives:

- companionship... I thought cats were supposed to be independent and moody, not these two... they can't get enough love. I watch a movie, Galina plants herself on my person and refuses to move.
- laughter... they make me laugh a lot. they're crazy.
- they're just cool.

negatives:

- They're everywhere... i can't walk without almost stepping on one, we end up scarring the shit out of each other... literally.
- lots of hair... everywhere (not mine)
- they shit- and i have to pick it up.

we'll see. the adventure has just begun.

in other news. I got really excited about my summer reading and purchased some literature from Amazon, (which I have recently frequented much)

books I will read soon, very soon:

The Road by Cormac McCarthy
Slaughter House Five and Cat's Cradle by Kurt Vonnegut
Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix by JK Rowling

I am really, really excited about The Road.... really excited.

Send me in coach... I'm ready to play.

2007-04-23T22:21:00.000-06:00

And so, just like that, its been a year. and what a year its been. Smiles, laughs, tears, and beers... i kicked smoking, so now i can smoke without the guilt of being addicted.
Drove from Colorado to Chicago, Colorado to Washington DC (two times), Colorado to Lynchburg VA, Lynchburg to Chicago.
I spent some time in in Japan, Korea (South), India, Brazil, Argentina, and California, with a few trips to Colorado in the mix.
God and I decided to put aside our differences. Actually it was more of me realizing that i'm shit. not just regular shit, but nasty, steamy, hot shit. Its been an interesting road, twisty and rough, but so good.
I spent a couple of months in the Virginia Mountains. Reading, hiking, building a deck, spending time with family, it was wonderful. Given the space to make some decisions about life. Developing a few ideas... with the desire to return to school the overwhelming favorite, finally becoming a reality.
I have settled in Wheaton, IL. Found a quaint little apartment, 1 block from my sister and her four girls. I am doing school on-line. taking care of a few undergrad pre-requisites before starting my journey to and through Grad school. with Psychology being the focus of my studies.

Its nice being back in the game. and so begins round two of blogging.

and for the record, in case you are reading my blog with the intention of firing me... whomever whenever, you know who you are. a boss or some authority figure. everything I have written is fiction and everything I plan on writing is fiction. this blog is for entertainment purposes only. go fuck yourself.

slow dance.

2006-04-24T00:19:00.000-06:00

I took a nap today. I visited my sister and helped her pack up her house. my nieces running around undoing it all. we sat around the table and ate an early dinner... a delicious roasted chicken with lemonade. I sat on the couch and watched the baseball game. my sister working on her computer. the girls playing some version of house in the corner. I drifted off... i woke up and it was dark. It was nice to sleep in such a chaotic environement with a touch of the seren. problem is I work tomorrow and i won't likely be sleeping anytime soon.

I like my room for the first time since I moved into this godforsaken house. Its taken a while but I like it. I didn't know why i was feeling so unsettled. but i was. and so I added and took away, I moved this there and that here. and still felt no love. a month ago I took everything off the wall and minimized... it was better. but not quite right.. and then this weekend I got a call from my douche bag land lord telling me he was going to need all the furniture I was using. which was my dresser and bed. and he took it all. so i packed up all my clothes with the exception of the few i need. i got a mattress, which rests on the floor. I have a lamp next to my bed. i have 4 small plants in strategic areas and I have one mirror because I'm fucking vain. and that is all. and i am happy.

Work is keeping me busy. which is good.

I listen to wonderwall. via cat power. it is good.

I have been watching a lot of netflix. but today i had a thought about blockbuster.

I eat tasty food almost every night. self-indulgence is good.

the new bed.

2006-04-24T00:05:00.000-06:00

yesterday I aquired a new bed... and now there is a hint of gasoline in the air. I suspect the mattress. shit.

The Pictures

2006-04-20T21:33:00.000-06:00

Its been a while since I posted. Lifes been on the busy side and quite honestly I simply have not had the energy to sit and write for some time. and so I will show you pictures. First few I took in the Dominican Republic. 2nd few I took while recently fishing. it was good. chat soon.

Poor Richards

2006-04-07T20:03:00.001-06:00

I sit, i drink english breakfast tea.
I am liking the coffee shop more. its taken a few visits... its trying to be the 'cool indie coffee shop' attached to the 'cool' indie used bookstore which is attached to the 'cool' indie organic resteraunt. and theres a guy with a 'dead' shirt playing a xylophone. its all a bit too much. but they serve wine and great tea and they do really have tasty food and the free internet... its more i just dont want to like this place than actually not liking it. I often find myself headed this way when in the coffee shop mood... so i must be liking it.
I am enjoying the company of a great friend...
a few months ago we visited a kick ass Andy Warhol show. it was fun.

off to friday nights festivities...

that is all.

The Island

2006-03-14T11:37:00.000-07:00

I completed Hemmingway's The Sun Also Rises. it was my first hemmingway since school. after which i felt compelled to read a bit more on the life of hemmingway... learning that he lived a most fascinating life... truly an inspirational charicter... though, he did commit suicide, lived a full, emotional life. i look forward to reading more.

I am currently sitting in an internet cafe in santo domingo, dominican republic. I decided to take the day off of work today. I just left my five star hotel... to walk a bit. its a cool place santo domingo. they mostly like americans... but a few dont; also, b/c we work in the slums, i spend most of the time in shady areas where they see me and think... money. so it can be a bit dangerous. and the jr high girls stare at me and that can be awkward... other than that its been fun, considering its paid for.

for the record, booze and banana week ended well... though, momentum slipped... too much potacium... and i guess after reading the comments, my friends now thing i am an alcoholic, let me assure you, nothing could be further from the truth... nothing... absolutely nothing... nope.

today i woke up at 9. am

sat on patio facing ocean, read miami herald, drank coffee, smoked ciggarettes, listened to music.
i ate ham/cheese/tomato ommelette. more coffee.
i went to get ready to go on my walk, got stuck watching 'life of brian' funny.
walk through park... walked by 4 pickup baseball games. maybe i saw the next pedro or sammy... who knows.

i head back to the rockies on saterday... mixed feelings.

life moves on...

The boy has returned home

2006-01-26T14:34:00.000-07:00

well that was a hell of a ride... right on... I have returned to Colorado, my head filled with memories of the times shared, good music, success and defeat; my liver hurts, mostly due to the cha cha 1.50 PBR.
The objective was to mix a little work into play and a little play into work. work quickly got eliminated after the morning after quickly became later that afternoon which then became 'how about brokeback?' and then slipped into yet another round. I was able to catch up with all the good people from the southland, but unfortunately missed a few folk, which I am sad about... and for all those missed you are not forgotten, I raise my glass and would like to say 'cheers' and good tidings.
I did not leave unscathed, I did have to write a report listing my many experiences work related... which with a little creativity and imagination scraped together what appears to be something the boss won't only like, but will likely encourage me to do again. That being said, I don't like being put in a situation which forces me to be sneaky... at the same time, that’s what they get for making me do things I don't like to do... even though they do pay me to do those things.
I want a job where I don't have to be a sneak. A job which would allow me to socialize with really great people, much like all of you. drink beer or tea, but mostly beer. Read great books, watch movies, listen to great music... and where I travel but i don't pay to travel, they pay. that’s what I want... mostly a beer.

a few more items...
I was inspired by my friends homes...
The Gloyds- a humble little spot... sleek and new. shiny, comfy, great neighborhood.
The Simmons- cozy and small, but also very comfy; great neighborhood.
The Bethencourts- cool house, old and mysterious... super comfy with a kick ass yard.

which reminds me, I hate where i live... and I signed a year lease... makes me mad.
But mad turns into glad when I do a little research on the craigs list and realize that good times are not too far away and the few short months leading up to the big move I can begin saving for some furniture that I like. which make me really happy.

I am not from here...

2006-01-13T15:29:00.000-07:00

It has been brought to my attention (and confirmed) that the correct way to spell Juanaco is Guanaco... But I've decided I don't give a shit... the misspelling is a tribute to my confused history and herritage, bottom line is I have no country, and I am not contained by these borders. I am of this world not in it... Damn, fucked that one up to.

This weekend=Fun.
tonight- the old dubbliner... Irish wiskey and maybe a guiness or two, great irish music.
Tomorrow -- Patriots at Denver, 1st playoff game ever...
Sunday -- weather permitting, fly fishing.

and next thursday... I return to the sun splashed land of southern california.

open door next right

2006-01-10T09:04:00.000-07:00

Movie that should be rented or maybe netflixed, if thats your thing... good... intense... spoke of my home country in the era we lived there... Sad but good.

Next I watch the Wilco Movie... I am excited.

I am currently listening to Sufjan Stevens... Enjoying 'Illinois'.

Everyone in Colorado hits the mountains... 'hits': more snowboarding and less skiing... which is cool, and I anticipate I will enjoy the moments I will have to glide down that mountain... but its a few hundred dollar investment... one that I just am not quite ready to make... and people really dont understand me when I say I have no money to go skiing... Its not like they are rich either... but I guess they make sacrifices that I am unwilling to make... whiskey will not be cut out of the budget... I just thought that was understood, but people in Colorado are different. Their outdoorsy. Mountain folk. who do enjoy their occasional whiskey, but on a smaller in scale.

Last night I walked into my local coffee shop... I say hi to suzi and miranda and ask for my roiboos tea... I find myself a couch with a view and sit down with a new book: Tuesdays with Morrie... an inspirational read. I begin, the book is good... I look up and I see someone I recognize... its a girl. Hmmm, where do I know her from? the Christmas party, we exchanged some words at the party... damn... what was her name. she walks over. says 'hi dan'... I say. 'hey' we chat some... she gets a coffee and makes her way back to me... I remember her name 's-----'. We've never actually talked talked, only party talked... it ended up being quite nice, chatting next to a fire, comfy couch and a nice girl... shared some stories... Heard her story. cool girl, cute girl... suddenly I feel intimidated, she's got some cool things going for her, some cool stories... I don't compete, I just listen... Its getting a bit warm, too close to the fire, why does this happen? Damn, I think I am perspiring... what? who perspires??? shit... I try not to panic, but its too late, I feel the drops rolling down my face. I feel foolish. I excuse myself and head to the bathroom. I grab a handful of towels and wipe off my face. a little cold water. I stare at myself, trying to get it together... why does this happen? oh well... I compose myself, realize its no big deal... wash my hands and head out. I sit, she smiles, it begins again, rush of blood to the head, I breathe... I wait... it works, I have relaxed... our conversation finds its rhythm... and were off. Its late, I analyze... we don't have enough in common, she's too good for me... could I be happy??? I say, fuck it, lets give it a shot. I ask for her number... she smiles and gives it to me. She says she has to go meet some friends to watch 'the bachelor'... we hug, i say goodbye and think... ‘hell no, my chick isn't going to be watching no bachelor’... I slow down, she's not my chick... and its not that bad.

I go outside... take a smoke, I find myself happy. that was good... who knows what will happen, but that was good.

oh what a night.

2006-01-04T08:10:00.000-07:00

Happy New Years... I love it, changing of the guard... away with the old and in with the new... Fresh start.
I decided that I will not have any New Year resolutions, mostly because I am just tired of failure, and well, I am just not ready to change. I will only slightly try and improve life...
.more intentional with work.
.read more books.
.watch less TV.
.persue integrity.
and the list could go on... I am not quiting smoking, or eating better. Those I will leave for a time when certainty=success.
New Years turned out to be a good time... though, I was a bit sad I didn't make it to the Jason Belt New Years extravaganza, I still managed to have fun. I have made some friends out here... pretty cool friends... We made it up to Denver, got a hotel right off 16th street, and proceeded to do some celebrating. several highlights,
1. Dancing with old ladies... super nice jazz club... of the classy sort... about 10 pm... the old ladies and I hit the floor and made all their old rich husbands jealous.
2. Denver tickertape celebration and fireworks.... and a really cute russian girl.... and well... a big happy new years was in order. out with '05 and in with '06.
And so to all of you... may it be a blessed 2006, live life to the fullest.

The fire within

2005-12-21T10:01:00.001-07:00

Cash, the big fuck you, sentiments shared by most, and occasionally by me. It starts from deep within and claws its way out and before you know it the middle finger has found itself up, alone, shining for all to see... Pure emotion, rage, you can see it in his face. This reminds me of... Jason

less visual emotion, but it is still clear that the same rage burns within. He is clearly not happy to see the camera man, or clearly not happy that a few guys have taken his car out for a spin on a deathly hot day in the southern California desert... The excessive burst of emotion is often brought on by excessive consumption of ... What appears to be a 40 oz bottle of Miller's great
classic beverage: High Life. A tasty treat which can be consumed in a variety of places including; a tasty bbq, the occasional camping trip, perhaps just a fun get together with some buddies, the big game on Saturday... Whatever it might be, its a treat to enjoy with friends. Though we must monitor the heavy consumption of this beverage due to the unhealthy state of extreme drunkenness which is often put on display by none other than Jesse , who is one of the greatest drinking companions due to his great knowledge of all topics... One could discuss the arts, certainly sports and specifically baseball, literary works, musical theories, and life's philosophies...But one needs to take caution: baiting Jesse into a verbal or perhaps a physical confrontation can be quite dangerous, for he is certainly not afraid to put the fists up, or display his dislike by yelling perversities; this could cause some harm but has also proven to be quite entertaining... Physical altercations can also occur if baiting any of the following into confrontation: Drew, Allan, maybe Sycz, definitely Harbaugh, occasionally Billy, and we cannot forget Jason... Then there are those whom enjoy a peaceful time consuming beverages, those included Matt B, certainly Simmons (with the exception of one (1) outburst of passion and vigor) Andy, M.O.B., Brent, and Maust... Though there are certainly exceptions to this rule. I understand that there will be a bit of a reunion of sorts for the new year... I am unfortunately going to miss this get together due to lack of financial resources... This is a difficult reality to face but one I face nonetheless. I will be making a business trip mid-Jan and will have a few extra days to spend with friends and just visit the, as drew would say, sun-kissed land... Good day. I leave you with this wonderful photo of times together...

Thankful.

2005-11-28T13:46:00.000-07:00

Thanksgiving break was amazing. I worked the first three days of last week. But the work was easy and not stressful. Which usually means I just put stuff off so next week will be stressful. but thats ok. Thanksgiving day was great. I ate a lot of great food. my sister's family and I went over to friends house and we hung out. It was cool. I met a whole new group of people, people who love God, but perhaps a bit more liberal than your typical colorado springs christian. which is extodinarily nice. My parents came into town. really nice. I bought a car. freaken awesome. 2002 nissan maxima. it rocks and rolls. it is rediculously nice, I got a great deal on it. and the Simmons came into town, we did the Denver thing. and then went bowling in Golden Colorado. Amazing. great times.

feels like 13 feels more like 8

2005-11-15T13:42:00.000-07:00

I like blogs, I like my friends blogs, I will start a new blog, called el juanaco, which is what i am I am a juanaco, which is one born in el salvador, because I was born in el salvador i am called el juanaco. I am not sold out on it though, I thought long and hard and was left with that. and so I will stick with that. and thats ok with me.
Its cold today... really cold. I looked it up on weather.com and they said it was only 27, but their was fine print that said 'feels like 13', which is more like it. I just came back from my lunch break, which usually includes a quick sandwich, followed by a coffee, my ipod, a magazine perhaps a news or music magazine, and a couple quick cigarettes. an hours worth of goodness... keeps me going. Today I stood beside my car, and smoked about half my cigarette and quickly got back into my car. 'felt like 13' felt like 8. really cold. ice cold. my lunch was only 15 minutes long.
It is 2 pm and I am at work, There are days of lots of work and there are days of lots of computer play at work, Today is a computer play day. I will try and get some stuff done, after I get another cup of coffee... and maybe use the bathroom...